If you are looking for tips for how to get your boyfriend back, and haven’t read the post on the importance of the No Contact Zone, then I suggest you do that first, before you read anything else.
I will repeat it but briefly here, the first step in getting your boyfriend back is to not do anything as far as he is concerned for 30 days. That “anything” means, anything in the way of contacting him. No contact for 30 days, that is your first of many tips for how to get your boyfriend back. It’s a big one.
In that post on the importance of the No Contact Zone I discussed the importance of the space that you have been given. This is a time out, a breakup, a break, a whatever you have called it to help yourself get through the day. It’s space. He may have asked for it and you want to reverse that. You may have asked for it and now you have changed your mind. Whatever it was that lead you to this place, you are in this place regardless. Now you want to get him back.
The No Contact Zone
The No Contact Zone is a 30 day period where you are going to enjoy a little freedom. It may not feel like freedom to you, because you are in pain right now. That’s okay! You are allowed to be in pain! You are entitled to that, and what you want to do is take that pain away. Calling him, texting him, emailing him, whatever it is you think can help you take that pain away though, isn’t going to do the job.
It’s going to make you feel worse. Because chances are, you aren’t going to hear back from him. And you will feel a little desperate and needy at the same time. So you’ve got your breakup pain, added to the pain from being ignored by him AGAIN, and the additional pain from feeling desperate and needy for resorting to that point again.
I’m actually trying to save you from that. Don’t do it. It’s time to take care of you.
When you are thinking about tips for how to get your boyfriend back, and kicking and screaming your way through the No Contact Zone, you are likely replaying everything over in your head trying to figure out where you went wrong. Why this happened.
I will give you that. As women, that is what we do, especially if the break happened when he pulled the fade out or blow off. We like our closure, and don’t really like it when men don’t give it to us. It drives us crazy. If that’s what happened to you, forget about him for the next 30 days and try to focus on you.
Real men don’t do that.
Real men have that awkward conversation that shows you they loved the time you spent together, but for some reason it just isn’t working right now. If you got that, you are one step ahead. If you didn’t, beating yourself up over it and overanalyzing it is again, only going to make you feel worse. Realize it was not a real man that did that to you, and you may feel a little bit better about the situation already.
Spend the next 30 days working on you. Enjoying being single again. Doing the things that you didn’t get much time to do when you were with him. Instead of texting him, text other people. Text your friends, go out and socialize, date even if you are up to it.
Just enjoy this break.
We all need a break from stuff sometimes. We need breaks at work. We need breaks FROM work. We need breaks from the kids. We need breaks from our friends. We need breaks from…our men. Even happily married couples know the benefits of giving each other a little space from time to time.
You have been given this space. The very best tips for how to get your boyfriend back are to use it. Enjoy it. And take advantage of this time to reboot, rejuvenate, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start feeling better about yourself again. In 30 days, you may not even want to call him. Maybe by then he will even be missing you and calling you. If you have spent the 30 days sniveling and crying and feeling crummy about you, you are not in the best place to accept him back into your life when he does call.
Remember that Chumbawumba song? “I get knocked down, but I get up again, you’re never gonna keep me down.” That’s what you need to do right now. So when you do start working the magic to make him miss you and come back to you more committed than ever, you will be ready.
And he will be amazed and… want you back.
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